A Novel by Jonathan Griffiths

Sex

“…She took me by the hand, led me to the toilet and locked the door. ‘How do we do it?’ I whispered. ‘I thought you’d be the expert,’ she giggled, kicking her shoes off, wriggling out of her jeans then slipping her knickers off.

I got such a massive erection I could hardly get my button undone. She danced around me provocatively while I struggled to pull my jeans off over my shoes. She pushed me down onto the toilet and sat astride me, while I pushed one shoe, helplessly, against the other. [Read More...]

Drugs

“…Johnny pulls over to the middle of the road to stop for a chuck. The hallucinations take the opportunity to crowd in – horses, cows and big fucking semi trailers. Blitz keeps him cool, no need to panic.

The kids pile out. Time for a piss. They join dad, lined up across the road, three standing, one squatting – a close family. [Read More...]

Rock’n'Roll

“…At around 9:30 I went to the toilet. Ever Fallen in Love? had just started – my all time favourite Buzzcocks song. I pushed the door open on the start of the fourth bar, zipped my fly down on the start of the first verse and let loose through the first verse and chorus. ‘Ever fallen in love,’ I sang along, spraying up and down the urinal. Luckily there was no one else there. There was a loud crash somewhere outside. I zipped myself up on the first bar of the [Read More...]